Deven Beef Cakebread
Paladin
One of the only paladins in town.
If it weren't for him, well we would have a couple more problems to deal with.
He really likes helping people and smiting the criminal, he really does.
He also likes to wear his traditional Highland sportswear, its so comfy.
Kilt and suit, just go up on a hill and play golf.
But he has a dayjob.
He's the tavern Bartender and the main one with Kurt and Martyn off doing their silly things in the forest
(Chasing butterflys I don't know)
He only has 3 other co workers who help him but they're all come around at different or barely overlapping times.
Cakebread has to deal with the shit buggers that don't pay or make a ruckus.
One time when he wore his kilt, he got called a funny man.
The man who called him a funny man didn't want to pay for his drink and was warned
"5 coins or else."
The man simply tried to punch him, thinking he was bluffing about or else.
Cakebread obviously bat him with a stool and gave him a chance.
Cakebread is had enough shit up to tiff taffing here, ready to explode.
Even though Cakebread left the man the option to pay after getting his Greatsword out, he was on the verge to just slaughtering the man.
"10 coins for the mug and damage to the stool or else" Cakebread said.
The bitched and moan about it not being fair for him to draw his greatsword out.
Cakebread couldn't believe how the man bitched about rules of engagement and whats fair, attacking him in the tavern, Cakebread's jobplace and duty.
The man was lucky enough that he paid the 10 coins and left.
But what if he wasn't, what if he just bitched one more setence about whats fair in a fight?
Cakebread thought in his mind, the little scenario of what would happen.
"If ye bitch about whats fair or not, I'll slice ye and tell the guard what happened, ye attacked me over paying coin."
"Herrr like ye would attack me with that sword of yours, ye-"
I could move into a golf strike and gut him upwards
I could lop his head off, fast and simple
I could spork his chest, and oh wait, i could twist it about, make him suffer.
I could lop his feet off first, chop him up like a butcher.
I could stab him once, then exorcise him with the light of Tyr for being a git, painful by god.
Imagineing it and what to tell the watch, they would believe him no doubt, since he is the bartender.
Cakebread ran through many scenarios in his head.
Though he couldn't do such, he'd have to clean up the blood and guts.
Oh well.
But everyone else won't know how its like for Cakebread being the bartender.
This picture just sums up what its like to be Cakebread when tending bar.
So please, tluin off, he's had it to tiff taffing here.
You don't want to be near him when the stahl hits the chandelier.
One day it will happen and you'll wish that you weren't such a twit, git being ignorant, bothersome or annoying.
Maybe ye should tip him as well, he has been serving the drinks and doing his paladin work.
Maybe ye should pay the tluining five coins or else...
Might end up like that one guy, almost sliced to pieces.
(Didn't know where else to put this, but ya basicly what Cakebread thinks when ye people act like twits in the tavern
I might expand on this, maybe write what would have happened to ye for what ever tavern rp to come.)
